Saturday, June 19, 2010


Big week. Real big. Big changes. I find that I feel refreshed, and newly energized. After all, as I said in my last post, when something really shitty happens you have 2 choices - to let it bring you down and ruin you, or to step up and say fuck this I'm going to rise above it. I'm choosing to do the latter. Earlier this week I felt like absolute crap and couldn't feel anything but upset. The thing that was strange was that I had anticipated the feelings for a long time prior and it honestly did not even matter at all when the time came. It hit me ten times harder than I thought it would and I had a very rough week overall. I came into the weekend realizing that it was pretty crucial to turn things around and get back to being me...the me that people like and want to be around. I think I had lost myself for a while this past year and that's not going to happen again, and it's certainly not going to continue any longer.

I find that some things really just anger me. Some of the things that made me sad just aggravate me when I think about them now, so I just put it out of my mind whenever those thoughts sneak in...or I just use it as fuel during workouts. People are amazing sometimes, both in disappointing ways and in positive ways as well. Certain people, 2 to be exact, have been instrumental in helping me get back up and helping me to feel good and just really kicking my ass to get out and get back to being myself. I think I've lost track of the countless hours I've spent talking things over with firefly and my parents and it's just so cool that some people are willing to take so much time out of their day to talk to me. It makes me feel good to know that people care that much about me, it's a great feeling. I owe them both big time and I definitely need to return that favor (labor day weekend firefleez!).

I think I'm going to start packing, I have some moves to make! Cheers~

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